Jim Newheiser has a wonderful acrostic to help husbands and wives remember what Ephesians 5 teaches us to give to one another. He tells husbands to give their wives TULIPs and wives to give their husbands HONOR.
HUSBANDS, GIVE YOUR WIVES TULIPs:
Totally committed to her in love.
Unconditionally sacrifice yourself for her.
Limit yourself to her alone.
Irresistibly draw her with a love that purifies.
Persevere in meeting her every need.
WIVES, GIVE YOUR HUSBANDS HONOR:
Hold fast to the role God has given you.
Obey your husband’s leadership for the Lord’s sake.
Notice how you can be his helper and do good.
Organize your life around your responsibilities at home.
Restore your husband when he strays from the Lord.
Listen to the Newheiser’s teaching to husbands here.
Listen to Newheiser’s teaching to wives here.
Article copyright by Bob Rogers.
It was the second game of the 2019 football season, and the New Orleans Saints were looking to get revenge on the Los Angeles Rams, the team that had eliminated them from going to the Super Bowl the previous year in a controversial game featuring a no-call by the refs.
Instead of getting revenge, the unthinkable happened. The Saints’ future Hall of Fame quarterback, Drew Brees, injured his thumb on his throwing hand, causing him to be sidelined for that game and for weeks on end. Backup quarterback Teddy Bridgewater finished the game, but the Saints lost to the Rams. Sports analyst Stephen A. Smith said, “The Saints are done without Drew Brees. Period.”
Fast-forward six weeks later, and the Saints have not lost a single game since losing Drew Brees! Teddy Bridgewater has stepped up to the task and led the team to victory after victory, allowing Brees to rest and rehab.
This sports story should be a valuable reminder to our own stories. Nobody is indispensable! In the Bible, when Moses died, the Lord told Joshua to put Moses in the past, and go conquer the Promised Land (Joshua 1:2)! When King Uzziah died after a long reign, the prophet Isaiah may have feared for the future, but God gave him a vision: “In the year that King Uzziah died, I saw the Lord sitting upon a throne, high and lifted up…” (Isaiah 6:1, ESV). The king was dead, but the King of kings was still on His throne.
Richard and Henry Blackaby, commenting on how the prophet Elisha continued the work of Elijah, said it well: “God has limitless ways to accomplish His will… We deceive ourselves if we think we are indispensable to God. Service to the Lord is an honor He bestows on us, not a favor we do for Him. If you are mourning the loss of one of your leaders, do not despair. God has another leader, for He will see that His will is carried out. It may even be that He has been preparing you to be that leader” (Blackaby, Experiencing God Day by Day, devotional for July 29).
Don’t misunderstand me. I’m happy for Teddy Bridgewater and the New Orleans Saints, and I hope that Drew Brees gets to play again. But God is more interested in His saints than those Saints. So let’s keep these truths in balance: God may use you or me at any time He wants, but when He does, let us serve with humility and gratitude, and remember that none of us are indispensable or irreplaceable. I’m sure that Drew and Teddy would agree.
Article copyright by Bob Rogers.
Five leaders of the Bible come to mind as role models for us: Abraham, Moses, David, Peter and Paul.
Abraham was willing to take risks. He was told to go to a land the Lord would show him. Are you willing to take the risk to go where you’ve never gone before, for the good of those you serve and lead?
Moses was willing to stand alone on his convictions against Pharaoh and later against his own fellow Israelites when they rebelled against the Lord. Are you?
David was willing to face a giant. Are you ready to take on giant tasks?
Peter was willing to admit his mistakes and change, after denying the Lord and after denying fellowship with Gentiles. That’s an important quality in leaders to be willing to admit when we are wrong and change.
Paul was able to get a vision and follow it. When he saw a vision of a man of Macedonia saying, “Come over here and help us,” Paul took the gospel into the continent of Europe for the first time. Do you, like Paul, have a vision for your work, and see the big picture?
As helpful as these five role models are, I have not mentioned the greatest example: Jesus Christ. Jesus was willing to sacrifice Himself for the good of others. Jesus said, “Greater love has no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.” (John 15:13). If you and I will follow the example of Jesus, and be willing to sacrifice our own desires and put others before ourselves, then God will bless our leadership. After all, Jesus knows better than anybody, that life can be as tough as nails.
Article copyright by Bob Rogers.
Why then were you not afraid to speak against My servant, against Moses? – Numbers 12:8, NASB
I often hear people complain about their pastor and other ministers. They complain about the lack of visitation, or about all the changes being made in the church, or about the style of preaching, and on and on.
Moses was the recipient of complaints all the time from the Israelites. Chapter 12 of the Book of Numbers tells us that his own brother Aaron and sister Miriam got in on it. As a result, Miriam was struck with leprosy, and the Lord asked a penetrating question, “Why then were you not afraid to speak against My servant…?” (Numbers 12:8) This is a good question for any church member to ask before speaking against their ministers.
I’m not saying that pastors can make no mistakes. Moses was not perfect. He made excuses at the burning bush, and he lost his temper with the Israelites. He had to suffer the consequences by not leading the Israelites into the Promised Land. But that was for God to decide, not the people.
I’m not saying a church member should remain silent when the pastor is guilty of moral failure or doctrinal error. As Ecclesiastes 3:7 says, there is “a time to be silent and a time to speak.”
What I am saying is that for many church members, when it comes to their opinions about their ministers, there is too much speaking and not enough silence. And not enough prayer. And not enough soul-searching. After all, Numbers 12 indicates that the issue that Aaron and Miriam had with Moses was not really his leadership– their real problem was that they didn’t like his wife. But since they knew how petty it would sound to complain about his wife, they complained instead about his leadership.
So before you speak against your pastor, take a deep breath, and realize the seriousness of what you are considering. Then spend time praying about it, and ask God if there is something else really bothering you that you need to address in your own life. Then if you still feel you must speak, go to your minister privately with your concerns. Go no further, unless the pastor is immoral or heretical.
Just in case the scriptural warning is not enough cause for pause, learn a lesson from history. Eudoxia was the Empress of the Eastern Roman Empire, wife of Arcadius, the Emperor who reigned at Constantinople around A.D. 400. The bishop of Constantinople, John Chrysostom, boldly preached against the wealthy living in luxury while the poor suffered, and Eudoxia didn’t like it. So Eudoxia had the bishop deposed and sent into exile. Shortly thereafter, she suffered a fatal miscarriage.
It doesn’t matter how important you are in your church, be afraid of speaking against the servant of the Lord. Be very afraid.
Copyright 2017 by Bob Rogers
Outreach magazine publishes a list of the 100 largest churches in America and the 100 fastest-growing churches in America.
But when we read about the church in the New Testament, we don’t read Paul reporting to the church that when he left Ephesus they were running 200 in Sunday worship. Instead of talking about numerical growth, he emphasizes spiritual growth. So why don’t we?
Instead of so much emphasis on church growth, we should talk about church health. So what makes a church healthy, anyway? Paul gives us a full description in Ephesians 4:11-16.
1. Leaders who equip
“And He personally gave some to be apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, some pastors and teachers…” (Ephesians 4:11, HCSB)
Just as healthy medicine requires a good doctor to make a diagnosis, healthy churches have leaders who equip their members.
In this verse, the last two leadership gifts are indispensable to local church health. In Greek, the terms go together, “pastor-teacher.”
Pastors (translated “shepherds” in the ESV) bring guidance and comfort to the flock of God.
Teachers instruct the church in correct understanding of the Bible and Christian living.
Notice in verse 12 that these leaders have the purpose of training, or equipping, the church to do their work.
If a church is going to be healthy, it must have a pastor/teacher who is feeding the congregation God’s Word on a consistent basis.
2. Members who serve
“… for the training of the saints in the work of ministry, to build up the body of Christ…” (Ephesians 4:12, HCSB)
Just as good hospitals have nurses everywhere who serve, healthy churches have members who serve. Churches that grow rapidly from sensational entertainment often burst like a balloon and wither away. But when members serve, they reproduce healthy growth.
The “saints” are all the believers. “Saint” means a “holy one,” and every believer is called to be holy and set aside for God’s service.
It says the saints are trained by the leaders so that the saints can do the work of the ministry. So all members are called to serve.
3. Unity in the faith
“… until we all reach unity in the faith and in the knowledge of God’s Son…” (Ephesians 4:13a, HCSB)
Just as medical staff work in coordination during a surgery, healthy churches are united and cooperate. Unhealthy churches are divided and refuse to cooperate. Notice the two ways he says we are to be united: by doctrinal faith (“in the faith”) and by personal faith (“and in the knowledge of God’s Son”).
Remember the lesson from Noah’s Ark. It may stink sometimes, but we have to stay together, because we’re all in the same boat!
4. Growth measured by Christ-likeness
“… growing into a mature man with a stature measured by Christ’s fullness.” (Ephesians 4:13b, HCSB)
We take vital signs to check physical health: temperature, pulse, respiration, blood pressure. Too often, churches measure themselves by numerical growth, but that’s the wrong vital sign. A tumor can grow, but it isn’t healthy. And some churches explode and then die down. Others grow and grow in numbers, but they are attracting people for entertainment or because their standards are lax, and people are not being discipled.
Notice that verse 13 gives the correct measurement of real growth: “a stature measured by Christ’s fullness.” That is our measurement of growth: are we like Christ? If our budget grows but we spend our budget on a bowling alley for church members instead of helping the hurting and sharing the gospel, we may be growing in numbers but not in Christ-likeness.
Healthy churches measure growth by being more like Christ.
5. Teaching that provides stability
“Then we will no longer be little children, tossed by the waves and blown around by every wind of teaching, by human cunning with cleverness in the techniques of deceit.” (Ephesians 5:14, HCSB)
The last thing a sick person needs is a “quack” doctor. Likewise, a healthy church guards against heresy and false teaching. Instead, the Bible is so consistently taught, that the members aren’t tricked by “quack” preachers and teachers.
Years ago, a powerful wind storm blew an oak tree on the youth building of the church where I was pastor. The tree had shallow roots, and when the winds came, it fell. A healthy church that teaches the Bible is like a healthy tree with deep roots. It doesn’t fall under the pressure of false teaching.
6. Honest and loving relationships
“But speaking the truth in love, let us grow in every way into Him who is the head– Christ.” (Ephesians 4:15, HCSB)
People often say to their physician, “tell it to me straight, doc.” They want a doctor they can trust who cares enough to be honest with them. Healthy churches have honest and loving relationships. “Speaking the truth in love” means that we are honest with each other, we speak the truth, but we are also loving when we do it. We don’t just try to please each other. If something’s wrong, we deal with it, but we always seek to deal with it in love. That’s challenging, but it’s vital to having a healthy church.
7. An environment that encourages involvement
“From Him the whole body, fitted and knit together by every supporting ligament, promotes the growth of the body for building up itself in love by the proper working of each individual part.” (Ephesians 4:16, HCSB)
A hospital strives to maintain a healthy environment, washing hands, putting on gloves, etc. Healthy churches create an environment that encourages involvement. “From Him (Jesus) the whole body, fitted and knit together… promotes the growth of the body…”
Many people think that it doesn’t matter if they are involved in the church or not, that the church won’t miss them if they are gone. Nothing could be farther from the truth.
A healthy church is a church where misfits can fit in. A healthy church is a place where the displaced can find a place.
This world is in desperate need of healthy churches in every community. Christian, are you allowing God’s Spirit to work through you to make and keep your church healthy?
Deep Mentoring: Guiding Others on Their Leadership Journey, by Randy D. Reese and Robert Loane is a guidebook for Christian leaders on why and how we should mentor future leaders. Deep Mentoring is a deep book. It is not an easy read, but it is well worth reading. The book is scholarly, yet practical; academic, yet full of pithy quotes and illustrations.
Reese and Sloane divide their work into three parts. Part One is entitled, “Noticing God’s Already-Present Action.” In this section, the authors show how we need to slow down enough to pay attention to people and their needs. Part Two is, “Learning from Those Who Have Come Before Us.” This section takes the reader through the stages of life. They give a powerful explanation of how important it is to know a person’s background to really understand him or her. Then they show how our roles change from young adults who are actors to middle adults who are actors who influence others, and how we should finish well as influencers. Part Three, “Guiding the Formation of Others,” shows the techniques that Jesus used to influence others, and then lays out a plan for the reader to do the same. Each chapter of the book includes specific exercises for the reader to apply to his or her mentoring relationship. Four appendices at the end of the book give practical tools that the reader can come back to and use again and again through the mentoring process.
I bought this book because I have a desire to lead my church in greater discipleship of believers through mentoring. After reading the book, I have an even greater desire for mentoring, and many new tools for the journey.
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