Blog Archives

The personal spat between Washington and Hamilton that reflects human nature

In Ron Chernow’s biography, Alexander Hamilton, he describes the personal disagreement between George Washington and Alexander Hamilton that mirrors the emotions and actions that employees and employers have to this day.

Early in the American Revolution, General Washington hired Hamilton as his aide-de-camp, recognizing Hamilton’s brilliant reasoning and writing skills. Hamilton was an enormous help, able to express Washington’s wishes in letters and other communications, including fluent messages in French. He even served as his emissary several times. However, Hamilton’s ability became a curse, because when opportunities came for Hamilton to be promoted to colonel or general and command a fighting unit, he was passed over because Washington desired to keep him by his side. It frustrated Hamilton to remain a lieutenant colonel.

One day, Washington requested to speak with Hamilton in his office, and Hamilton acknowledged the request but delayed for a few minutes to finish communicating messages to two other people in the building before turning up the stairs toward the general’s office. He was surprised to find Washington standing on the stairs, demanding to know why he had kept him waiting “these ten minutes.” Hamilton denied that he had been tardy and became so incensed that he resigned. Rather than talk him out of it, Washington accepted his resignation, losing his right-hand man, who returned to civilian life for a time.

This interesting encounter reflects human nature on several layers. Both men were proud. Hamilton was likely feeling unappreciated because he had been passed over for a promotion. Washington was offended that Hamilton did not immediately drop what he was doing to speak to him, since Washington was his commanding officer. What do you think they should have done differently? Was Washington wrong to scold Hamilton for the ten-minute delay? Should Hamilton have apologized and revealed his frustration over his lack of promotion? Should Washington have refused Hamilton’s resignation and spoken to him personally about it?

Later in the war, Hamilton was able to return to the war as an officer commanding a unit, and he led his men to capture a redoubt in the climactic battle of Yorktown. Washington recognized his talents and continued to be Hamilton’s patron. Both men continued to have great respect for each other and were big enough to forget the past. And later, when Hamilton was scandalized for committing adultery, Washington was able to forgive him, knowing how valuable he was to the country.

Beyond war, politics, and economics, history can also teach us lessons in personal relationships.

Valentine miscommunication

valentinegift

People think of love at Valentine’s. However, some of us fail to communicate.

A cake decorator in New Zealand was asked to include the reference to a Bible verse on the couple’s wedding cake. They requested 1 John 4:18 because it states, “There is no fear in love, but perfect love drives out fear.” Unfortunately, the cake decorator wasn’t a Bible scholar so the cake ended up with a reference to John’s gospel instead of his epistle. In beautiful print was “John 4:18.” Had the decorator taken time to look up the verse this error would have been detected before the wedding. “You have had five husbands, and the man you now have is not your husband.”

I heard about a man who was feeling bad that he had not been romantic. So he decided to show up at his door with a coat and tie and give his wife flowers. He rang the doorbell, and when she answered, there he was in all his glory, as he handed her a dozen roses. To his surprise, she sat down in the doorway and just cried.

“What’s wrong, honey?” he asked.

She replied, “This has been a terrible day. Rachel came home from school sick, Daniel broke a window with his baseball, the microwave won’t work, and now you come home drunk!”

Even though our attempts are communicating love can sometimes be misunderstood, we should still make every effort to express our love. The Bible has an entire book, Song of Solomon, that is dedicated to the celebration of romance between a husband and wife. I know a fellow who often reads verses from the Song of Solomon to his wife. Not a bad idea. Just make sure that you read the right verse. Song of Solomon 4:9 would work: “You have captured my heart with one glance of your eyes.” But you don’t want to read to her from Song of Solomon 7:4: “Your nose is like the tower of Lebanon looking toward Damascus.”
So if you’re thinking about love this Valentine’s, make sure you say it clearly.